When parents separate or divorce, the non-custodial parent (or Parent of Alternate Residence in New Jersey) generally has the right to spend time with their children outside of the presence of the custodial parent (Parent of Primary Residence). The details of that parenting time and the exact schedule that governs it can be decided either by the parents themselves or by a court.
If you are a father and need help concerning your parenting time, take a moment to contact us. Our child visitation lawyers focus on family law matters men face in New York and New Jersey, and we can help you protect your and your child’s best interests.
Who Decides Child Visitation (Parenting Time), and How?
Parents generally have the right to decide child custody and visitation between themselves. That means they can determine which parent will have primary physical custody, which will have visitation, and what the custody and visitation schedule will look like. However, if the parents are unable to reach an agreement, then a judge will need to decide those issues.
The court’s primary concern in a custody and visitation case is to make a decision that is in the child’s best interests. This requires considering several different factors, including, but not limited to:
- Which parent has been the primary caregiver of the child
- The parenting skills of both parents
- The parents’ work schedules and child care plans
- The mental and physical health of the parents
- Which parent will be able to meet any special needs the child has
- Whether there has been any domestic violence
- The child’s relationship to other members of the family
- The ability of the parents to communicate and cooperate with each other in raising the child
- Depending on the age, the child’s wishes
Although a parent can usually spend time with the child free from the involvement of others, there are special cases that require supervised custody visits. This usually applies if there is some evidence that the visiting parent will pose a risk to the child’s well-being.
For example, if a parent has a history of drug abuse or domestic violence, a court may order visitation to take place with another person present. When you are in this position, you are best advised to seek counsel.
Examples of Child Visitation (Parenting Time) Schedules
Although every family’s priorities for child visitation (parenting time) schedules is different, judges tend to adopt one of several common arrangements. Here are some examples:
Standard Visitation
There are a few options from which the court may choose, depending on the schedules of everyone involved:
- 2-2-5-5 Schedule: The child spends two days with Parent A, two days with Parent B, then five days with Parent A and five days with Parent B.
- 3-4-4-3 Schedule: The child spends three days with Parent A, four days with Parent B, then four days with Parent A and three days with Parent B.
- Alternating weeks: The child spends one week with Parent A and then the next week with Parent B.
- Every other weekend plus midweek: Parent A would have the child most of the time, but Parent B would have visitation every other weekend and one overnight or dinner visit during the week.
Supervised Visitation
A parent’s visitation rights will be more limited if the court decides that supervised visits are warranted. The actual amount of visitation time could be similar to one of the above schedules, with the only difference being that another adult must be present during visits, or it could be limited to one to four hour intervals on a given day.
In some cases, the judge assigns a social worker to monitor visits at a designated facility. In others, the judge allows a family friend or relative to be present at the parents’ house during visits. The contours of the visitation will depend on the unique facts of the case. And we tailor our recommendations to our client’s individual needs. Sometimes institutional supervised visits are more beneficial to our client, and sometimes a family member will do. This is a very individualized assessment.
Virtual Visitation
If there is a more significant risk to the child’s well-being, or if in-person visits are otherwise not appropriate or possible, then virtual visitation arrangements may be an option. The method could be a video call between the parent and child or a supervised phone call. A court may require more intense monitoring of the parent’s interaction with the child in these arrangements.
Custom Visitation
Since every family is different, so too are the relationships between parents and their child; judges have significant freedom to customize the visitation (parenting time) schedule. This includes customizing the amount of visitation time and the use of technology (e.g., Zoom) where appropriate. Parents can also devise their own custom plans and submit them to the court for approval.

How Do You Modify Visitation?
There are two broad ways to modify visitation rights. First, the parents can come to an agreement and submit a proposed modification to the judge. If the modification protects the child’s best interests, then the judge will enter the modification as a consent order.
In some cases, however, the parents cannot come to terms about how, or even whether, visitation should be modified. When this happens, the non-custodial parent will need to file a petition or motion with the court seeking the modification.
It is important to note that a parent cannot request a modification simply because he or she doesn’t like the current schedule. In fact, he or she must present evidence that shows that there has been a substantial change of circumstances since the issuance of the parenting plan and that same has impacted the child’s best interests.
These are some situations that may qualify as a substantial change of circumstances:
- The child has been abused or neglected while in the custodial parent’s care.
- There is domestic violence in the custodial parent’s home that affects the child.
- The custodial parent is unable to provide a safe and stable home for the child.
- The custodial parent is suffering from drug or alcohol abuse.
- The custodial parent has committed a crime.
- The custodial parent has interfered with the child visitation rights of the father.
- The custodial parent has developed a serious illness.
After the parent requests modification files, at the appropriate court documents, they will need to be served on the other parent. The court will schedule a hearing, receive evidence, hear arguments from both parents, and then decide whether to issue a modification order. If so, the new order will replace the old one.
How Does Relocation Affect Child Visitation?
If the custodial parent wants to relocate, this change could affect the non-custodial parent’s ability to visit his or her child. Custody and visitation orders are carefully planned arrangements that take into consideration both parents’ work and personal schedules. Moving to a different state or country, or even to another place within New York or New Jersey, could therefore impose an unfair burden on the other parent.
For this reason, a custodial parent who wishes to move must gain court approval before doing so. If the non-custodial parent does not consent to the relocation, then the custodial parent will need to prove to the court that moving is in the child’s best interests.
Child Visitation Attorney: FAQs
When can you deny visitation to the non-custodial parent?
Parents cannot deny visitation to the non-custodial parent simply because they don’t like them or disagree with their parenting skills. However, there are emergency situations in which the custodial parent may need to make a quick decision to deny visitation to protect the child.
For example, if the non-custodial parent shows up intoxicated to pick the child up, there is a potential risk to the child’s well-being. In a case like this, it’s advisable for the custodial parent to try to reason with the non-custodial parent and get them to reschedule the visit. However, if this doesn’t work, and the custodial parent decides that canceling the visit is necessary to protect the child, they should contact a child visitation attorney immediately after doing so.
What happens if a parent refuses visitation without just cause?
If a parent denies visitation without a good reason, the parent with visitation rights may ask the court to hold the custodial parent in contempt, which can lead to fines and other penalties. The parent who was denied visitation may also ask the court to modify the current custody and visitation order.
Can you stop paying child support if the custodial parent is denying visitation?
No, because child support and custody/visitation are separate matters. If you stop paying child support, the other parent may bring a contempt or enforcement action against you. It will not be a valid defense that the parent denied you visitation. So, if the other parent is interfering with your visitation rights, talk to an attorney about contempt and modification proceedings.
How does visitation work across state lines?
When parents live in different states, courts must take more care in crafting a custody and visitation plan that works for them. There may be more extended periods of visitation and custody, and less frequent exchanges of the child.
For example, the court may decide to allow the child to live with one parent during the school year and the other during summer breaks, with periodic visits throughout the year. Holiday visits are often extended as well. Speak with an attorney about the best strategy for managing visitation in this scenario.
Contact Dow Divorce Law For Help Protecting Your Visitation Rights as a Father
Dow Divorce Law advocates for fathers who are facing challenges with visitation. We help fathers understand their rights, create fair visitation schedules, request modifications where necessary, and handle relocation issues. We will work to negotiate an out-of-court resolution of your visitation issue if possible, but we aren’t afraid to take your matter in front of a judge if necessary.
When you have experienced legal guidance on your side, you can protect not only your role as the child’s father but the child’s best interests as well. Find out why New York and New Jersey fathers trust us to represent them. Connect with us today to get started with a strategy session.